Just had a realization – if I treat myself poorly (e.g. go to sleep at 04:00; wake up at 06:00), then I have an easier time treating myself kindly during the day – taking more frequent breaks, etc.
It’s like an implicit zero-sum game in my head – if I suffer some amount, then it’s easier to justify the self-care. If I don’t suffer then I feel way more stressed about self-care.
Hmm, lessons to be learnt, lessons lessons.